"'Safe?' said Mr. Beaver...'Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. but he's good. He's the King, I tell you.'" CS Lewis: The Lion, witch and the wardrobe
Friday, April 28, 2006,4/28/2006 05:37:00 AM
Relationship Control
As I look back after reading M's book, I am struck with this overwhelming feeling of wanting to hurl. I see so much of the behavior that he describes in his book, mirroring the behavior of city impact people.
I remember V saying once, that I shouldn’t have anything to do with ExWitch, because those people would drag me down. Even D saying quoting that scripture about a Dog returning to its doggy doo and that all ex witches did when they got together was sit sound and talk about the good old days and how much easier being a witch or a pagan was. I remember thinking at the time, what a crock, as if being a witch was easier than being a Christian. If I was still a witch, I could still be hooking and pro domming without any twinge of conscience. And making a whole bunch more money than I am now.
I can’t help but wonder if the God I have been exposed to is the real God, or the God of City Impact and Destiny Church. I feel angry, but I also feel ashamed that I was sucked into it. No coercion there, I wanted to belong to something. And I thought that CIC offered that. I can see now that belonging was only available if one didn’t question the party line, gave their 10% plus extras and gave bucket loads of money to the sacrificial offering, and went to every course available, went to all the power prayer meetings.
When God refers to sewing and reaping, and how in 2 corinthians 9 if we sew little we will reap little, and if we sew much, we reap much. I dont believe that just refers to money giving. It refers to how we are in life, whether we step outside the bounds of the bare minimum of what God expects from us or we just get by.
I believe that God doesnt just expect 10% of our money, he expects 100% of our lives. I believe that he is concerned with the state of the heart more than he is concerned with whether we gave 10% of our income. Dont get me wrong, I think its a good thing to give back to God and to support ones church
However I think God is more likely to ask us why we walked past that workmate who was suicidal, than why we didnt put 10% of our income into church.
I remember V saying once, that I shouldn’t have anything to do with ExWitch, because those people would drag me down. Even D saying quoting that scripture about a Dog returning to its doggy doo and that all ex witches did when they got together was sit sound and talk about the good old days and how much easier being a witch or a pagan was. I remember thinking at the time, what a crock, as if being a witch was easier than being a Christian. If I was still a witch, I could still be hooking and pro domming without any twinge of conscience. And making a whole bunch more money than I am now.
I can’t help but wonder if the God I have been exposed to is the real God, or the God of City Impact and Destiny Church. I feel angry, but I also feel ashamed that I was sucked into it. No coercion there, I wanted to belong to something. And I thought that CIC offered that. I can see now that belonging was only available if one didn’t question the party line, gave their 10% plus extras and gave bucket loads of money to the sacrificial offering, and went to every course available, went to all the power prayer meetings.
When God refers to sewing and reaping, and how in 2 corinthians 9 if we sew little we will reap little, and if we sew much, we reap much. I dont believe that just refers to money giving. It refers to how we are in life, whether we step outside the bounds of the bare minimum of what God expects from us or we just get by.
I believe that God doesnt just expect 10% of our money, he expects 100% of our lives. I believe that he is concerned with the state of the heart more than he is concerned with whether we gave 10% of our income. Dont get me wrong, I think its a good thing to give back to God and to support ones church
However I think God is more likely to ask us why we walked past that workmate who was suicidal, than why we didnt put 10% of our income into church.
